DOING BUSINESS MALAYSIA STYLE

Sometime, a long long time back, my former classmate at Clementi Primary School, Singapore, commented. “Wah! for malays like you, so easy to do business in Malaysia. When your company is going bankrupt, propose some harebrain and expensive project to the government, which the cabinet will then rubber stamped it’s approved. This in turn will generate an injection of capital to keep the company afloat. After that, if the company still flounders, give the excuse that it is a bumiputera company and the government will then bail out the company by using public funds”. That was what my former classmate said. I did not get angry but did enlightened him that all malays are bumiputeras but not all malays are UMNOputras. Only UMNOputras have the privilege of robbing the rakyat blind by using the bumiputera meal ticket.

Years later, my singaporean friend was proven right. Under the government Economic Transformation Program’s, Entry Point Project, some goondos came up with the 1Malaysia Email Project, which was given on a silver platter to XXXX Bhd who just happens to be on the soon to be delisted list of Bursa Malaysia.

Under the 1Malaysia Email project (1ME), the government will connect to the rakyat for official business, through 1ME which will be operated by XXXX. XXXX will then charge the government 50 sen for every email send to the rakyat who choose to be subscribers. Where do you think the BN government will get this 50 sen from to make the owners of XXXX, rich? Of course from the rakyat pockets.

What if the rakyat refuse to be1ME subscribers as there are free email services running around the internet? Simple mah! What do you think our parliment is for? They’ll passed a law to decree that from then on, all correspondence from the government to the rakyat will only be through 1ME. Since the government has it’s hand in all aspects of daily life, you will then have no choice but to subscribe to 1ME. How did this idea of 1ME came out in the first place. I have a theory. It goes like this.

One fine day, XXXX Board of Directors sat down to discuss the financial disaster the company is facing and how to avoid delisting. After some soul searching, some one realised that the nephew of the wife of a director is married to the second niece of the sister of the wife of a cabinet minister. Then, after days of brainstorming session at a 5 star resort, overseas of course, with golf, shopping and karaoke session thrown in and paid for by the soon to be bankrupt company, the BOD came up with the brilliant idea of 1ME which was duly presented to the honourable minister, with the side note that this project will help the bumiputeras. Project evaluated by MAMPU (one of the government’s yes man agency), declared viable and voila! the project goes online and the near bankrupt company is now laden with cash.

If after all this, the company still hancai bocai one, no problem. Ask the government to bail it out through Khazanah Nasional, on the excuse that it is a bumiputera BN related company. So now you know why the Singapore’s government Temasek Holdings can give around Singapore $800 as dividends, year after year to each singapore citizen while Khazanah Nasional cannot.

Don’t tell me after all this, you still want the same numbskull wakil rakyats to manage our country and cash?

Until the next "Save Our Cronies" project, is approved, bye bye from Uncle B, who would like to suggest to our cabinet that a Hovercraft Riverine Transport System be built in the Klang Valley along the Gombak River. Sure one, we can alleviate road traffic congestion, can give river widening and deepening project to a bumi UMNO linked company, supply of hovercraft to an MCA linked company and award the tender for building the hovercraft stations to an MIC linked company. In that way, the malay, the chinese and the Indians will be happy. 1Malaysia meh! No money, why worry. Cancel the subsidies and tax the rakyat.

Byeeee!!!!!